June 19, 2025
Today is Juneteenth, a federal holiday. Thanks Joe Biden, and every other sensible person who pushed for it. Now if we could just change Columbus day officially to Indigenous Peoples' Day, I would be even more pleased. I don't see the Great Tang Man of Doom moving in that direction however.
There is one thing that bothers me though about Juneteenth. Well perhaps a few things. One thing is that we are celebrating the day, 900 DAYS after the Emancipation Proclamation was actually signed, in which Texas enslaved people were actually freed. (And not all of 'em neither.) So typically Texan isn't it. To ignore law, civility, humanity and just do what they do until they get leaned on. One of the bigliest reasons white man moved to Texas was to escape the Civil War and not have to give up their slaves. So I suppose it is no wonder that it continues to be a godforsaken crap field of stupidity, stubbornness and undeserved feelings of pride. Except Austin of course, and most people of color that live there still. (Blink once if you are feeling unsafe. Blink twice if you need to be rescued.)
Texans have a habit of saying "Everything is bigger in Texas" Size queens. The biggest preventable measles epidemic is not a point of pride people. I think they all still believe its the biggest state in Union. It was for about 113 years or so but, I'm quite sure that recent change is not taught, since no real history is taught in Texas, and that's coming from an Arizona teacher. They celebrate the Alamo, even though America got it's asses handed to them by Santa Ana. Davy Crockett should have stayed out of the Wild Frontier that day. They were the forefront of colonizing Mexican lands and in the Texas Revolution claimed it. They moved the borders over the Mexican people living there, applied for statehood and now, almost 200 years later are STILL trying to get rid of families who lived there before the Republic.
This is the kind of crazy, arrogant, stubborn and stupid kind of behavior that one has come to expect from Texas. But hey now, "Don't mess with Texas". This was a slogan meant to remind people not to just throw their McDonalds wrappers and beer cans out the car windows, but has in the mind of these pea-brained prairie people morphed into "don't fuck with us we're armed". Did you know there are more guns in Texas than there are people living there?
Deep red Texas exemplifies to me all that is wrong with America, and I find it vaugely shocking that Trump didn't put Mar-a-Lago II there. Perhaps because a long treasured but lost legislation making it illegal as a denizen of the Northern East Coast to retire anywhere that isn't part of the Southern East Coast. Or perhaps it is his New York City mentality that make him feel superior, even to Texas. (I will save my screed on NYC for another edition,)
There is another slogan for Texas I have heard recently: Texas, It's Like a Whole Other Country. And I think that is a super fantastic idea. There is even a groundswell of support from Texas to secede. To quote the title of a popular self help book "Let Them." They were an independent republic before joining the U.S. Why not. Then we can add Puerto Rico as a state and not have to change the flag. Let's say "Ok, go ahead and 'Texit' but you have to take Trump with you. Donnie Dorko and Ted Cruz can have barbeques at his evil lair. That's it, that's the only concession I want take the Orange Threat with you and you can go. Enjoy your gasoline, we'll be over her with our solar and wind power. Have fun with your cowboy ways, we'll be driving our e-cars to museums to read about it. Just in case Donnie Dorko feels nostalgic for his old "friend" he can drive up to Boca Chica and piss on his rockets.... American could be so much better if these two evils combined into a more efficient tightly packed poop-sack of crazy. I think I have to log off here to go look up if I can join a Texas secessionist group from here in AZ.
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